6 Ways to Tame Tears（3）
Is It Colic?
All babies cry. But if your child is inconsolable for long stretches, he may have colic. How can you tell for sure? According to Barry Lester, PhD, author of Why Is My Baby Crying? (HarperCollins), babies with colic exhibit these symptoms: cries that are louder and higher-pitched than normal cries; signs of physical pain when they fuss, like pulling their legs up, clenching their fists, or going red in the face; and sometimes (but not always) following the Rule of Three — crying three hours a day, three days a week, for three consecutive weeks.
The same techniques that soothe mildly fussy babies can chill out a colicky kid too. But “you just may have to do more of them, and you may have to do them longer with a colicky baby,” says Lester. Develop a rotation of greatest hits, alternating soothing strategies such as swaddling, singing, and shushing until you find something that works. Also, don’t hesitate to talk to your pediatrician if your baby’s crying is hard to handle or it interferes with normal life, or if it just seems unusually intense. And just remember: Colic usually ends at 3 months.
Is It Ever Okay to Let Baby Cry?
Not all parents are comfortable leaving a baby to cry for even a minute. However, Marc Weissbluth, MD, author of Your Fussy Baby (Ballantine), says it won’t harm your child. “The fact is that babies cry even when they have perfect parents and all their needs are met,” he says. “Making parents feel like they need to attend to their child at every moment just creates unnecessary guilt.”
Once your baby is 4 months old, rest assured that it’s okay to let her cry it out for a bit. If you’re sure she’s clean, dry, and well fed, allow a few minutes of fussing and grunting — what Dr. Weissbluth calls a “pre-cry state” — to allow your baby time to soothe herself and drop off to sleep on her own. If she’s still fussing after a few minutes, check on her again, placing your hand on her chest or shushing her to reassure her you’re nearby. But don’t expect her to make a change overnight. According to Elizabeth Pantley, author of The No-Cry Sleep Solution (McGraw-Hill), if your baby has fallen asleep only in your arms, crying it out probably won’t work right away. “It’s a step-by-step process to gradually move them toward independent sleep.”